When Brett and I got married, we made a promise—not just to each other, but to our future kids—that they’d grow up knowing both of our traditions. I was raised Jewish, Brett was raised Catholic, and together we decided to create a home where both Hanukkah and Christmas could shine.
And honestly? It’s been such a gift.
Every December, our kids get the glow of menorah candles and the sparkle of Christmas lights. We celebrate Hanukkah with my parents, Christmas with Brett’s parents, and squeeze in our own little family rituals too. The key for us has been keeping each holiday distinct, so they both feel special—and never like one is competing with the other.
But more importantly for us, is the culture. It’s about our history, and teaching our kids that celebrating more than one tradition makes them richer. We want them to grow up seeing diversity as something beautiful, something to respect and embrace—not something to fear.
A Simple Guide for Interfaith Families
There seems to be a growing number of parents raising their children in interfaith homes, and there’s really no wrong way to do it. What’s important is to focus on whatever works best for your family. But if you’re curious, here’s a peek into how we make it all work (with a little laughter, a lot of love, and maybe too many latkes).
Keep the Holidays Distinct (But Both Magical)
One tip for interfaith families is to remember that Hanukkah and Christmas are separate holidays that shouldn’t compete with each other. Each celebration carries its own special meaning and traditions.
With Hanukkah, we go all in: lighting the menorah every night with my parents, singing blessings, frying up latkes until the house smells like heaven, and playing dreidel (my kids get very competitive over those chocolate gelt coins).
Then, we travel to Brett’s parents house and slip into full Christmas mode with his family. Think stockings with our names on them, extended-family chaos on Christmas Eve, and Christmas morning in matching pajamas while we sip coffee and hand out presents.
By making both holidays distinct, our kids never feel like one is overshadowing the other—and honestly, it makes December feel like one long, sparkly celebration.
Find the Magic They Share
This doesn’t mean they can’t intermingle in some ways. We don’t spend a lot of energy trying to separate every single detail. For instance, we have Hanukkah ornaments on our Christmas tree, decorate our golf cart to honor both holidays, and have even brought our menorah to Brett’s parents to sing the prayer and light the candles when the two holidays overlapped.
There are also so many similarities between Christmas and Hanukkah. Both holidays celebrate light, togetherness, love and perseverance.
And here’s the thing: when our children see that two very different traditions can share common values, they learn something bigger. They learn that cultures—even ones that don’t look or sound the same—often carry the same heart. That’s a lesson I hope stays with them long after the last candle and ornament are put away.
Talk About It (and Let Kids Ask)
Children are naturally curious about their dual heritage. Another tip for interfaith families is to talk openly about how Mom and Dad have different religions and explain the significance of each tradition. So, along with the fun, we also tell the stories. The Maccabees. The Nativity. We want our kids to know that holidays aren’t just “about the gifts”—they’re about remembering history, honoring traditions, and appreciating the values that shape who we are.
Our kids know Mom is Jewish and Dad is Catholic, and we’ve always kept that conversation open. They ask questions and we answer honestly in ways they can understand. (There are a lot of great YouTube videos and books for kids out there that have helped us along the way.)
This is where the cultural piece really comes in. It’s not just “our” holidays we talk about—it’s the idea that lots of families around the world celebrate differently, and that’s something to be curious about and proud of. By understanding our traditions, they’re better able to understand and respect others too.
(If you struggle with maintaining an open and calm demeanor during tough conversations, check out my tips on How To Be Patient With Your Kids.)
A Simple Guide for Interfaith Families
Blending two sets of traditions isn’t always seamless—sometimes it’s a juggling act, but it’s always worth it.
Your unique family celebration makes the holiday season special. By honoring both parents’ traditions, you’re not just doubling the joy and memories, you’re teaching your kids that being open to multiple cultures isn’t confusing—it’s a true gift. It helps them grow into those compassionate, curious, and respectful humans we all hope to raise.
And at the end of the day, holiday joy isn’t about what’s under the tree or how many candles are lit. It’s about honoring where we come from, celebrating what we share, and raising kids who see diversity as something to celebrate.
For more on embracing the beautiful mess of parenting, read about the Challenges of Motherhood: An Ever-Changing Adventure in Imperfection.
Lovely!